[brace yourself, it’s a weird one]
This dragon lived in a magical city lair, on the fortieth floor of a luxury downtown high-rise in a cavernous penthouse suite. The windows were tinted and dark, but even so the dragon’s giant stash of treasure could be seen near a mile away, glistening under the low glow of its own internal fire.
What did this mean? Well, this dragon’s stash wasn’t your usual ruby-encrusted gold chalices and silver ringed armor. No, this dragon had modernized. He was obsessed with electric light fixtures and shiny home décor and would stay up late reading the best in interior design, which the city specialized in and whose many condos and penthouses featured some of the best style the dragon had seen in 800 years.
So every night, when the lights of the city flickered down, this dragon would cruise alleyways and rooftops, flying low and slow, looking for the latest chandelier or creative nightstand to add to his collection. He still wasn’t good at entering foreign premises surreptitiously, but he had progressed beyond his old scorched earth ways, and now merely broke a few window panes here and there, carefully extracting his desired piece with a winged claw, trying his best not to break anything else, most especially not the piece itself. Then with his latest treasure grasped close to his heart, he would flap back home and find an ideal spot to plug it in on top of the football-field-sized pile of high-end finishings. Occasionally he would find an appliance he liked, a shiny new toaster oven or a vitamix, and add those to the stash.
It was only when his northern cousins visited down from Scotland that he began to question the lifestyle that had him cruising under the cover of smog or blue or black sky, his scales camouflaging against the different backdrops as need be, searching for the newest innovation to add to his collection.
“Dear cousin, whatever happened to decluttering?” said Azkook, over the giant chessboard in this dragon’s living parlor.
This dragon moved his rook across from Azkook’s queen and looked at him questioningly. “Whatever do you mean, Azkook? You know we dragons live for clutter.”
Azkook held up his queen to the light. He reached behind his back, pulled out a book and threw it at his cousin.
“There. Marie Kondo. I can’t believe you haven’t come across her yet in all your interior design reading. Start with that. Then try Sasaki. You’ll be a minimalist in no time.”
This dragon looked sadly around at his enormous pile of flickering lights and chandeliers. “I don’t want…to be a minimalist.”
“Just imagine cousin,” said Razkook, from across the room where he lay reading upside down. “All this space, empty! You could actually fly around! You and your guests would have space to sleep, instead of having to lie on these uncomfortable piles of treasure the way we have for centuries. Do you know how many times I used to wake up with the imprint of a grail or an axe head in my sternum? And for what? What have we ever DONE with all of this stuff?”
“Experiences,” said Azkook, nodding sagely and huffing smoke through his large nostrils. “Experiences are the way to go, I tell you. For instance, if Razkook and I had kept our treasure pile, we would have had to hire someone to watch it just to come down here and visit you. Instead we used the proceeds from our estate sale to buy meat pies and travel the world!”
“You have a point,” said this dragon, reluctantly. “But can’t I just keep…a few?”
“Oh sure. Keep whatever brings you joy. That’s Kondo gold, after all. Just make sure it’s actual joy, and not just living vicariously through your possessions instead of dealing with your emotional baggage and getting out into the world.”
“Infallable advice, as always, brother,” said Razkook. “Now can we eat these shortbread cookies we brought all the way from Scotland? And look, they match your game.” He held out a plate of biscuits, and this dragon partook, thinking all the while of how he could still express his appreciation for the design of material things without physically owning all of the fixtures in the big city.
- Dark Cookie
- ⅔ cup cassava flour
- ⅓ cup tapioca flour or arrowroot starch (could try using only cassava flour, or subbing this w/ tigernut - worth messing around with)
- ¼ tsp sea salt
- 1 tsp ground cinnamon (optional)
- 2 tb carob powder (for AIP), cacao powder (non-AIP), or cocoa powder (non-AIP) (you could also try blending in dates to the dark cookie to get the color and avoid using another sweetener)
- ½ cup grassfed butter (non-AIP), ghee (AIP re-intro) or
- coconut oil (AIP/V)
- 2-4 tb maple syrup (adjust to taste)
- enough water to bring together (start with 2 tb)
- Light Cookie
- ⅔ cup cassava flour
- ⅓ cup tapioca flour or arrowroot starch
- ¼ tsp sea salt
- ½ cup grassfed butter (non-AIP), ghee (AIP re-intro) or
- coconut oil (AIP/V)
- 1 tsp vanilla
- 2-4 tb maple syrup (adjust to taste)
- enough water to bring together (start with 2 tb; sometimes I take out the sweetener and use coconut water here for a less sweet version)
- Make the two different cookie mixes by mixing each ingredient list together in separate bowls (whisk the dry ingredients together then add the fat (doesn't have to be solid) and sweetener).
- Once mixtures are well-mixed, add enough water to bring the dough together into a pliable ball.
- Roll both out between plastic wrap/parchment paper to form a rectangular sheet around 6 in wide, 9 in long and 1 cm thick (doesn't have to be perfect). White and dark sheets should be approximately the same size. Wrap sheets in plastic wrap or parchment paper. Leave in freezer for 30-45 minutes to harden.
- Once sheets are fairly solid, remove and place on cutting board. Cut out ~9 equal sized rectangular strips (~1 cm wide, 9 in long) from each sheet. Lay each strip in alternating colors three across (e.g., white brown white on bottom, brown white brown on top of that, white brown white on top of that...this would be easier to demonstrate with a video but I haven't found this method online and refuse to get into video blogging). Wrap the rectangular blocks (you should have two) and place back in freezer for another 30 minutes.
- Remove from freezer and cut cookies (~1 cm wide) from rectangular block.
- Once the cookie shapes are ready and laid out on a parchment-lined baking sheet, bake at 375 degrees Fahrenheit for approximately 20-25 minutes, or until cookies have hardened and are just starting to brown.
- Remove from oven and allow to cool. Serve at teatime or whenever you feel like colorful geometric treats.
Pre-baking
In which I learn not to photo food on a rug
This post has been shared on Phoenix Helix’s Paleo-AIP Roundtable.
My family is in love with your recipes. Real winners with my 3 boys. I noticed most of your baked recipes uses cassava flour which doesn’t work for my family. Do you have any recommendations of a good aip substitute for cassava flour?
If cassava flour doesn’t work because of the price (It’s so expensive!), you can get similar results with cooked, drained and food-processed yucca/cassava root, which you can find in most markets, especially Latino markets.
You are such an amazing writer.