Mama Bear sat with Papa Bear, rocking back and forth in their porch swing. “She did it again,” said Mama Bear. Papa Bear put down his newspaper in consternation. “No! Not again!” he said. “Yes,” said Mama, shaking her head. “That girl. I just don’t know what to do with her, I tell you.” Papa Bear…
Almond Paste Poppyseed Tart (Mohnkuchen) (paleo, vegan)
It was a dark and stormy night—wait a second that’s too cliché, let me try that again. The nocturnal period of dreams and subconscious musings was as black as the inside of a cow’s teat whilst moisture-laden cumulonimbus clouds gathered above the rock-lined fortress, a veritable Pentagon of impenetrability with its stainless steel gates and…
Linzer-Torte Cookies (paleo, AIP, vegan)
In the city of Linz, Austria, under the smallest of the bridges crossing the Danube as it winds its way from Germany towards Hungary lives a family of trolls – three brothers, to be precise, formerly of the Berlin bridges but forced to move during the monster raids of ’76. For the past several years, the trolls have lived…
Chocolate-Dipped Macaroons (paleo, AIP, vegan)
Hoppy the Penguin was an entrepreneur. Now, you might think it unlikely that penguins would be entrepreneurs, and you would be right. Penguins are conservative. They wear only black and white, get exactly twelve hours of sleep a day, and any penguin who bucks the colony gets excommunicated to Alaska. But Hoppy wasn’t like the others. Even as…
Scottish Short-Dragons (paleo, AIP, vegan)
One winter in the northern climes of Scotland, two dragons sat around their mountain lair, contemplating their empty larder. “Bummer,” said Azkook, gazing glumly into the pantry. “Not even any dried human jerky or jellied knees left.” “What happened to our backup supply?” asked Razkook. Azkook looked at his scaly toes guiltily. “I was watching Top Chef…
